Today was a good day. Mom was less confused and squirrelly. She even ate today without too much prompting. I went to the bead store first thing this morning and bought the supplies needed to fix her Mother's bracelet. She is much more relaxed now that it's fixed.

It was cool and gloomy here today. They skies are overcast. I hope that the sun comes out sometime this weekend. We need it.

I hate this disease. It is stealing my Mom's dignity and independence. Tonight she is so squirrelly. Maybe it's the weather change like Annie says. I don't know. I just know that her mother's bracelet that I made for her broke and this seems to make her really confused. She keeps pointing at her wrist and wondering where her bracelet is. I remind her that it broke and we need to go to the bead store to get a new clasp. We'll do that first thing tomorrow. She always seems to get really upset whenever something happens to her bracelet. I think because all 3 kids names are on it it equates to losing her kids when something happens to it.

Today I was feeling down, thinking about my parents and the fact that both of them have had to suffer through hell in the final years of their lives. Dad was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer only 2 years after he retired. He did not deal well with this news, who would? He passed away before his 67th birthday. He and I were the 'gruesome twosome'. Now I'm watching my mom slip away. My dear mother. I've always been a mama's girl. My parents protected me from pain when I was younger, but they can't protect me from the pain of watching them slip away. I just want my mom back the way she was. I know this is selfish and impossible. And I want my dad to protect me and make everything better.

It's still cold here. From 90s to 40s in one week is just too much of a temperature change.

Just got a note from the director of the day program. Mom is doing better and better each day. I'm glad. It's hard to gauge how she feels about this because she never mentions it, even with prompting. Though tonight she did say someone made her go into the bathroom 'because she needed to'. I don't know if this was someone at the day program or if it was Joyce. Tonight she seems more emotional and she was holding her head even though when I asked she said she didn't have a headache. She also didn't have much of an appetite tonight, but that is normal since she probably had a good lunch.

It has gotten cold here. I brought my hibiscus plant into the house in an effort to keep it. I also turned the furnace on.

Mom's UTI still has not cleared so we have started another course of antibiotics. Guess it's time to break out the yogurt again. I hope that this round clears it up. Poor Mom. I have to be more diligent with making sure that the specimen is taken 48 hours after Mom finishes the antibiotic. She seems to be more upbeat tonight. Tomorrow she goes to the day program. I hope she has fun. Her nose seems a little stuffy tonight, I hope she hasn't caught a cold. There is one going around.

I made an appointment for our flu shots. The soonest that we could get in is Oct 26. That should be soon enough I hope.

The weather has cooled off nicely. It was a cool, crisp autumn evening, perfect for a fire. I'd love to have a chimenea on the patio.

Lily has been talking. She's part Siamese so this is not unusual. She has always been a chatterbox and will hold a conversation with me. Olivia has not been a talker, but I think she's learning from Lily.

Mom seems more upbeat tonight. She is watching Murder She Wrote and even teased me about the unintentionally blackened chicken breasts that I made for dinner. Olivia was sleeping on her lap when I called her for dinner and of course she didn't want to disturb the kitty. So I brought her dinner to her.

I feel like this disease is wearing Mom down. Between the arthritis and the AD she is really looking old and feeble and tired. It's so sad to see. I wish I could do something for her. I pray that she gets some sort of joy once in a while in this life. But it seems like she always has this pinched face of pain and suffering on her face and it kills me to see it. I hate this disease.

Today we received the diagrams of the proposed riser steps for the garage. That is amazing! Now we are waiting to get a bid from a contractor. The riser steps include a larger platform and run parallel to the side of the garage therefore requiring only one handrail. The other railing would be attached to the garage wall. I'm excited to receive the bids. At first Mom was certain she didn't need this, but the rest of us have other ideas about this. The Ramp Project

It was so hot today, 90 degrees which is about 30 degrees higher than normal. J came over, well actually Satine saw me on the patio and she bypassed George and Kathy's new puppy Bailey (who is pretty darn cute) and came racing over to see me. Mom heard J talking to me and joined us on the patio. Satine, who had been playing with Bailey, came racing over and climbed up to be by Mom. She is the sweetest little dog. Olivia and Lily observed the two puppies from behind the patio glass door. Bailey is a little black Shih Tzu. Very cute but he is teething so he chews on people. Mom was into it.

The gloominess persists this morning. The weather is supposed to clear and heat up after lunch.

I finally received my new carpet cleaner and I just tried it out on Mom's bedroom carpet. The intake tank was really dirty so I think it cleaned up the carpet fairly well. Next I would like to do the den but I have to plan that carefully as that is the room that Mom lives in.

This is fascinating:

Thank You Dan Rather

We are back from the dentist where Mom had her teeth cleaned. It is a gloomy day, overcast and raining one minute, with bursts of sunshine interspersed. Breakfast got off to a bad start. Mom was just about to sit down when she said 'Uh oh.' That usually means an accident. Yuck. Kinda kills the appetite for both of us. But we got through it. The man from the ramp project, which recommends ramp styles as well as people who can build them, for disabled people comes at noon. Last night I had the new tire put on our car. It was sad, the old one didn't even have 700 miles on it.

Joyce left a note saying that Mom cried when she came to pick her up yesterday because she didn't want to leave her friends! How weird is that? I'm glad Mom has her own thing to do 2 days per week. Sometimes God just sends the right person into your life and in our case he sent Joyce. She is a treasure.

It's too hard to do this today. First I had a humongous migraine which only lessened after I took a nap at lunch. Then as I was driving home the tire pressure monitoring system light was on. Took the car to have it checked; there's a screw in the side of tire where the rubber meets the road. Luckily VWs come with a full sized spare but now we have to buy a new tire. Got home and Mom had a mess in her pants. Got that all changed, got her as cleaned up as possible then sat down to relax. I obsess about whether Mom is clean enough, especially after the whole UTI thing. Speaking of that, I have another urine specimen to drop off at the lab, when will I have time to do that with my 6:30 to 5:00 schedule?? I need an assistant. I lost it tonight and just let the tears flow. I felt better afterward. Remember to take it one day at a time. But it's so hard. There is nobody to really confide in on a day to day basis. I try to keep it inside at work.

The days are getting shorter; it's dark by 7:00 and no longer light when I drive to work in the morning. I don't like winter and shorter daylight hours. Time to move to the equator.

Flinty is right, things come in 3s. I hope in this case, they don't.