Wednesday, September 28, 2005

I wish I could win the lottery and remove myself from the rat race. I can still remove myself from the rat race though I suppose. Instead of simplifying my life I have created a complex, exhausting life. Commuting for an hour to a job that is stealing my soul. The one bright spot at my job is the people, who are amazing. I would guess that most of them are introverts like me and perhaps that is why we all get along so well. I guess this proves that there are bright sides to everything.

One of my coworkers is using her vacation to help EARS (Emergency Animal Rescue Services) care for animals and pets displaced by the hurricanes. She is my hero. It must be heart wrenching work and I'm not sure I could deal with it emotionally so I provide monetary support. Thank God for people like her.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Cell Phone Mania

Public cell phone usage is the bane of our society's existence. Everywhere I turn there is some clown who feels that "it is all about me" and therefore they can talk, very loudly I might add, on their cell phone whenever the spirit moves them. I was in the grocery store the other day where some man with his children was talking away on the cell phone (and for once it wasn't to his wife asking what brand of something they need). His children were misbehaving and cranky, even going so far as to tell their father to hang up the cell phone. Obviously they've been subjected to his blatant neglect before and were fed up. Today at a restaurant I witnessed a man reenacting the Verizon commercial "can you hear me now" as he attempted to get a better signal by moving throughout the restaurant while speaking into his cell phone. Daily I am subjected to obnoxious, rude people who insist upon sharing their life's most intimate details with the other passengers on public transportation. The bus company has resorted to posting signs in an effort to bring realization to this idiots that they are sharing public space and should be aware of the comfort and safety of others in said space. Has it helped? Somewhat, though last week I had someone sit next to me in the very front seat of the bus and procede to speak in a rather loud voice to various cohorts for most of the nearly hour ride. It was ironic, she was right below the sign. There is a time and a place for cell phone usage. People need to understand that it is pure rudeness to assume that you can use said phone anywhere and subject others to your conversation. You are not in your living room, you know!

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Animal Victims of Katrina

Please visit www.hsus.org to contribute to the rescue efforts for the animals who were affected by the Katrina disaster. Animal life is as important as human life; remember the story of Noah's Ark? I am moved by the stories of courage that continue to come out of this disaster; both animal and human.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Depression is for real!

What is up with Tom Cruise and his scientology buddies when it comes to psychiatry? As someone who suffers from recurring unipolar depression, I can tell you that vitamins and exercise just don't cut it when it comes to curing depression. In fact, their hubris is putting lives at risk. Anyone who thinks they can tough it out when they are faced with major clinical depression is in serious, life threatening danger. Help, either through therapy or medication is essential. I know this because I tried to tough it out. I spent months dreading each day and wondering how I would ever make it through. Yes, I had thoughts of dying just to escape the pain. Mental pain and despair are perhaps the most debilitating type of pain imaginable, at least they were for me. I received so much advice from do-gooders; "wrap yourself around your religion" said one person. The problem was that my thoughts became so clouded by the despair that I could not even imagine the existence of a higher power. I brooded about death and dying and suddenly doubted the existence of heaven. I couldn't concentrate at work; a career I had enjoyed suddenly became the bane of my existence. I couldn't concentrate and the daily routine was no longer rewarding. To top things off, my manager, who knew of my bouts with depression, picked that time to push his weight around and bully me and others on the team. There was no compassion or understanding even though he later admitted that he knew I was struggling with depression. What he didn't understand is the implications of major clinical depression. It is a life threatening disorder that needs to be taken seriously in the workplace and in society in general. I was chastised for being irritable. My usually sunny, upbeat personality with a can-do attitude changed to one of dread and pessimism. Shouldn't it occur to someone who has known me for over a decade that something was seriously wrong?

I applaud Brooke Shields and the courage that it took for her to share her story of postpartum depression with the world. Tom Cruise and Leah Remini have no business judging her or anyone else who has struggled with depression unless they have walked a mile in the shoes of a major mood disorder. "The blues" are not the same as major depression. Shame on them for saying otherwise. Brooke, you go girl!

Nine Years and Counting

Mom has been gone for a little over nine years. This blog was a huge mechanism for helping me cope with her illness and daily downfall. I...