Sunday, July 27, 2008

Icky Dilemma

My sister and I are struggling with whether to tell and when to tell Mom she is moving to a memory care facility. In the past when I have mentioned it Mom has gotten very upset and agitated. She likes being in her home. Doing what she wants to do when she wants to do it. This is going to be hard. How do we do it? I'm going to check with the geriatric care manager to see what she suggests. And my therapist. Does anyone else have any ideas? I'm not looking forward to this. I've already read that it's one of the hardest, ickiest things a child is faced with when their parent has memory loss.


flintysooner said...

I also think it's going to be hard. I never had to have that talk but I remember when my parents had to do it with my grandmother.

But I did have to do some hard things that were kind of like it I guess. One was going to the hospital when dad's blood sugar was about 700. It was terrible. The only thing I could figure out was to steel myself and make it happen and that's what I did. And it was painful but it had to be done. And then afterwards it was soon forgotten.

Of course there were new things that were also hard.

You have to start with the end in mind and there's just a certain amount of emotional resolve that you have to find inside to get it done.

Having your sister on board helps a lot I think.

~Betsy said...

Robyn, I wish I had the right words for you. I have read that it's best not to tell her early because she will fret about it. Have you checked the archives on the Alzheimer's board? There could be some helpful suggestions there. I'm also glad your sister is with you on this. It's hardest without help from the siblings.

Annie said...

I don't have any advice, only support to offer. Hugs!

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